The Wanderer

Johnny Cash, R.I.P.

you hurt us all today
see that we all feel
we focus on our pain
it throbs cold, all this is real.

why does everyone we love
go away in the end.

sole voice
meandering horizon
comes beneath your black boot
the wanderer is lost
sunset came too soon

and as you search
for your beloved june
may you find that final peace
with your bible and your gun

who will guide us now
who will be our man in black?

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freewrite.

We are at the crossroads here, and as we sit here thinking about what the path ahead of us may show – we are still here thinking about all that may happen and there is another time when all of this would be ok, and yet, there we are and here are the words as they come from my finger tips, a much more quick movement from thought to realization – almost yet not quite as clear as from thought to speech – we are forever trying to replicate our brilliance in speech in the written word, and forever falling short. Perhaps this is the reason why I obsess over the possibility of carrying a microphone around with me wherever I go – the tidbits at least somewhat more comprehensible, relevant, and good in the speaking, the crumbs more delicious as audible bites than the stutter-step of the written word. And yet – I never come around to being able to do it, and I’m still thinking about what else there is that I could be writing about – and the stream of consciousness that is today is the art of tomorrow. Or maybe in this stream, there is no time – there is no today or tomorrow – only here and now – and we do not age, and we do not lose, and the immortality that we all are seeking can be found in the words that we speak without pause.

The spell is broken as we awake, and here we are in loneliness, for you are lost, at last.

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REAL-TIME MUSIC REVIEW #1... Still by nine inch nails

REAL-TIME MUSIC REVIEW #1... Still by nine inch nails
Currently (as of right this minute) listening to the first tracks of Still by nine inch nails... it’s really something – the equivalent of an acoustic album for an electronic/industrial group, it’s really quite powerful. I’m in the mood for quiet, introspective work that may have something else lurking beneath the surface. I’m not sure if this album is an anti-mix collection of older stuff, and in the interest of being as true to life as I can, I’m posting my thoughts as writing, rather than the cleaned up version that would come after I go online to check what the heck this album really is. It’s a bold move for Trent Reznor, considering how much of his work thrives on the rhythms that he creates, and the mechanical constructs in which his wounded persona lives. But perhaps at the end, this is the most raw, the most brutally honest that he could create because he has discovered that his voice in itself is the best instrument to capture the pathos that his menagerie of characters are living.

Wait – there’s a live band coming in, or at least that’s what it feels like – fading up in the aftermath of the fragile. There it is – there’s the volume that I was looking for – and it’s just his voice coming up over the explosive (live?) thunderclaps of percussion that wave over the track. And the feedback of the guitar that lives beyond that one track... that may be the beginning of a more electronic album that I... wait. Now we are in The Becoming, and it is again a piano... playing a rhythm that repeats.

OK – now I hear the electronic sounds that I was expecting all along. What a ride. “It’s a part of me – it’s inside of me. It’s changing me. I am becoming.” His vocals are still very much at the forefront of this track. It’s great to hear a real piano (or realistic piano sound, at any rate) be used in this context. I wish that I had the whole album. Damn file sharing has given me a listening experience without the climax that I would have hoped for.

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Mercury in Retrograde

My partner tells me that mercury is in retrograde. That explains why in the past couple of days, my imac pretty much died, the work laptop came down with that famous virus of the moment, whatever its name is, and I can’t seem to get anything else to work either. Earlier, I might have thought, what a load of crap. But now... it’s not so easy to dismiss it, because I’m sitting in the middle of the storm. Well – at least there wasn’t an unfortunate incident with the power drill that I was using quite a bit while setting up the apartment this weekend.

Been listening to a lot of music again – which really makes me happy. And as usual – it’s a pretty wide range of things. Never was a big fan of Elton John, but have really been getting into Tiny Dancer after watching Almost Famous last week. Recently got Sigur Ros’ important album, Ágœtis byrjun, which is just a remarkable piece of work (and was actually quite hard to find at the major chains... had to go, forgive me – what can you do when you have a gift certificate?). Also getting into Zeppelin – it’s amazing that it’s taken me this long. Found a cool site (sorta done in a hack job style, though) that brings together some of the major Tolkien references in Led Zep songs. After finding that gem, I decided to look a little more, and found the following, far far more extensive list of references in music throughout the years and the genres. I was amazed at what i found there. It’s remarkable how many people have used his work as a launching pad for their creative ideas. Some of the Scandinavian fantasy metal bands are truly scary in how they’ve based their entire catalog on his stories.

I guess the same can be said about most fantasy writers, for that matter. You know – that makes me wonder. Have there been any really good fantasy writers out there that have decidedly POC characters as the main protagonists? And when I write People of Color, I don’t mean AOC (Aliens of Color), because I don’t care how many Tangerine, Aqua, and Violet bi-pedes from another galaxy are in the plot, they still can’t make up for the oppression by The Man of people of earth tone colors (Shout out to TC) right here on the blue planet. I guess that’s why I’m still a big Star Trek fan. Even though it treats human race as a conquered issue (i guess I can afford it this, because it IS supposed to be way in the future + it’s science fiction, after all), it still deals with issues of oppression, hegemony, assimilation, conflict within the sphere of different species in the Universe. Star Trek may be a joke in a lot of ways, but the writing, when it was good, still broached many topics that were very tough for others to even begin to talk about back when Rodenberry’s saga first came to the small screen.

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yeah. so a lot of good things have happened lately, with connections increasing between myself and friends from the past... but with it also comes some interesting questions about time management and trying to do too much - a common issue for me to ponder and work on (while i'm sleeping).

co-worker is giving me heartburn. hoping that this thing will disappear, but the good angel side of me hopes that it won't be too sharp an axe if it falls. why do some folks have to escalate and make things more of an issue that they gotta be?

been listening to sigur ros' album... the one that actually has a title. also got the donnie cd, the colored section, but i don't like it much. i think that i don't like r&b, only "new soul", as narrowly defined by erykah badu, jill scott, maxwell, and a select few others. i don't have time for all those runs in the middle of songs about things like mac'ing. only mac'ing i'll be doing is on my pair of trusted iMac G3s, and the new powerbook in the household.

is there anyone out there? holla if you're reading this.

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just realized something else - the list of serendipitous connections grows ever longer. looking to go offline and write real letters again. any takers?

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i-hate u-haul

one other thing though. i just remembered: I HATE U-HAUL. They suck so bad, i want to throw up.

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well - it's been a while since the last post. it's actually been 3 months to the day. guess that's what a wedding will do to you... throw your whole routine into a dizzy sliding spinning craziness. anyways - so the deed is done, and i'm a happy man as a result... but it's a hard thing to adjust yourself with someone else in the room. get your mind out of my pants - i just mean that you have to consider a lot more when you're co-habitating and you're trying to meld your life with someone else. i'm open to any tips if there are any out there.

it's been quite a week with faces from the past... the weekend before, i reached out to an old friend from peeling, who came through in a flash when i needed it. meanwhile, a newer friend from the old crew came out to my b-day gathering, while i got a much more surprising call from an old old friend with a personal peeling connection, who remembered me after all these years for an opportunity that shocked me to no end. more about this later, but what a week. inspires me to reconnect with some folks that i've been lax about speaking with over the years. life is short, and so few people really care... can't let those relationships go without a fight. makes me think about contacting a peace corps writer that i once knew well... perhaps if even just to talk about the springsteen show that we went to on july 24. but more about that at another time. it's time to go to bed...

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Project Description:
IN WHAT LANGUAGE?
a song cycle of lives in transit
An exciting and inspiring work of music and poetry by composer Vijay Iyer and librettist Michael Ladd, In What Language? is an urban song cycle that explores expressions of cultural identity and persistent stereotypes in an age of expansive global diaspora through a series of interior monologues by fictional passengers in transit at an international airport. Scored for an ensemble of seven musicians and three speaking voices, the piece draws upon a broad range of musical influences including experimental jazz, hip-hop, African rhythms and South Indian Classical dance music.
Thursday, May 8
Friday, May 9
Saturday, May 10 and
Sunday, May 11
At 8:00 p.m.

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wow. they got this guy. and it's finally being stated openly and clearly. now will we get an appropriate response from the politicos out there? likely not - this "atrocious murderer" will be played off as an anomaly in this patriotic, caring, freedom-loving place...

NY1: TopStories Man Charged With Serial Murders In Brooklyn, Queens Stores
MARCH 30TH, 2003

Police Sunday charged a man with a pattern of killings at stores in Brooklyn and Queens over the past two months.

Larme Price, 30, was charged with four counts of murder and two counts of attempted murder.

Police say Price walked into a Brooklyn police station on Friday offering to help find the killer, but investigators became suspicious when they noticed he had the same walk as someone seen in a surveillance video from one of the crimes. Price confessed when they talked to him again Saturday, police said.

“Price told detectives he had been disturbed by the terror attacks of September 11 and wanted to hurt people of Middle Eastern descent,” Police Commissioner Ray Kelly said. “At the time of his questioning, Price was wearing a baseball hat with a ‘B’ on it, the same hat we believe he was wearing during the murder on March 20.”

Four immigrants were killed in businesses in Queens and Brooklyn since February, most recently at a convenience store in Crown Heights on March 20. Only one of the victims was Arab.

Police had initially said they were searching for an accomplice as well, but investigators now believe he was just a witness.

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"The president boasted at the top of his press conference that we have the support now of Britain and Spain for our attack on Iraq. You know, when you want to make it perfectly clear to the world that you're not an imperialist, the people you want in your corner are Britain and Spain."

- Bill Maher

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this is just the kind of thing that gets on my nerves. first, who made these folks the spokespeople for all of us, and second, why isn't there a different perspective added to the mix... something that goes beyond the old "it's not us, it's them" thing that has been going on for too long...


Boro Hindus promote faith to fight prejudicial attacks
from the Times Ledger... By Alex Ginsberg 03/27/2003

In the terror and chaos that followed Sept. 11, Hindus were often the target of misdirected bias attacks by assailants who did not know the difference between Hindus and Muslims. Now, even as the United States enters the second week of a war that may prove more difficult than was originally thought, Hindus in Queens say they’re confident that they won’t be targets again.

“I don’t think that is any fear,” said Uma Mysorekar, president of Flushing’s Hindu Temple Society of North America. “Perhaps during the Afghan war, because there was so much lack of understanding. At the moment, most people are pretty much familiar [with Hindus].”

Rajendra Sharma, the head priest at the Neelkanth Mahadev Mandir temple in Hollis, said he was the victim of misdirected bias attacks several times following Sept. 11. On one occasion, in December 2001, he was pushed by several people who told him “go back to your country.” “We look similar to Muslims,” he said. “People think we are Muslims. Hindus are very peaceful, very loving. We don’t like terrorism. We always try to help people, to love people.” Sharma does his part to foster better understanding by preaching every Saturday morning in services that are open to all. “I always try to tell everything scientifically what are Hindus, Muslims, Sikhs, and so on,” he said.

He added that his audience often draws non-Hindus, including Muslims and Sikhs. Like Mysorekar, he said he was not worried about an increase in bias incidents due to the war. “I’m not worried because I trust this country,” he said. “And I trust this country’s security.”

Both Sharma and Mysorekar said no special security precautions were being taken at their temples. But Mysorekar said the mood could turn ugly if the war goes badly for the United States.

“As soon as a few POWs were taken, everyone’s heart began to sink,” she said. “It was horrible to see, and it gives you a sense of anger. It might precipitate some of those bias attacks, but if the war goes as expected, and the U.S. wins, it is a great victory for President Bush and the entire world.”

Reach reporter Alex Ginsberg by e-mail at Timesledger@aol.com or call 718-229-0300, Ext. 157.

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let's get into this... an era begins here and now, in the heart of infamy, the moment that we find ourselves in.. and let's see if this site can give me someplace to channel all that i'm feeling about this world at this point and moving forward...

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